It’s a really long struggle in the mid of 2018. The need of
confronting bad luck is on the next level. All I want for throughout the year
is people who treat their surroundings in a caring and mindful way. Just like
what Kugy and Della has offered to me, the strength to deal with my struggle.
[One click away for previous story: Wrapped Impactful Things Up Throughout 2018, What Turned Me To Be More Mindful (1/2)]
[One click away for previous story: Wrapped Impactful Things Up Throughout 2018, What Turned Me To Be More Mindful (1/2)]
August: Meaningful
The independence month took me to more meaningful journey.
First and foremost, I went to Kahayya—remote highland area in hometown,
Bulukumba—for being volunteer in Kelas Minggu Ceria. This community aims to
enhance the interactive learning and empower primary schoolers through edutainment. My best moment that I
eventually concerned more about early age education and give positive impacts
even it was still a drop in the ocean. Another equally important, I sailed to
Saugi Island along with Kugy and her friend. The same thing as Kahayya, Saugi
also inhabited by younger generation who routinely attended class which was
provided by volunteerism. Unlucky me, the moment when I went there wasn’t the
school time.
After those remarkable journeys, I learnt one big thing. When
I had talks with kids, it was not only me who transferred theoretical
knowledge to them. Further and even more importantly, though, they taught me
how to smile, laugh, and be happy for simple reasons. That what’s I almost
forgot since few months ago. I mean, yeah, I used to smile and laugh out loud,
but in a bitterly fake way.
September: Okay
Was beginning my very first September with new great circle
which I had a lot in common. We got to know as the book club Makassar meeting
was held. Kudos to the founders, Sike and Melan, who united us in such
remarkable way. Anyways, this agenda also relieved me since laughter and jokes
are so natural and clicked.
Unfortunately, I was also getting anxious due to the fact
that I had to leave Makassar and all the good as well as bad things within it.
The negative thoughts were getting intense, I considered my poor condition and
might be getting worse when I would be in new and alienated place. I flew eventually
to East Java and found that… hey, it wasn’t like what I thought before. This
also brought me to deeper understanding as an over thinker: sometimes we are too frightened about the things which hadn’t occur yet, sometimes we put so much
strains on our thought to think too much about it, but at last we would find
out that everything will be okay, all we need to do is start and strive.
October: Healing
Being in a totally transformed place is a bit difficult for
me. Adaptation used to put me in harsh time. So grateful that I was
surrounded by warmhearted and fun-loving buddies here back then, it was that
easy to adapt with new location. Another stressor, I realize, that I would get
attach to them and since I won’t be that long to stay here, all the goodbye and
farewell things would be such a mess at the end. I tried so damn not to get
involved with the social interaction and pretended to be an antisocialist, yet
my attempt always failed. They deserved my attention and no matter how
melancholic I would be when the time had been over, I was still into them.
October was also my healing month over the period. Just like
last year, I attended as volunteer at Ubud Writer and Readers Festival. Since
my first sight, long before my first attendance, I had fallen in love soooo
deep with the ambience and the festive of this 15 years agenda. Going in a solo
traveling also rebuilt my confidence and independence regardless of how fragile
I was at the moment. Reunited with old volunteers, forged strong bond with new
ones, met inspiring speakers and fave authors, attended meaningful talks,
stayed at peaceful and homey city, how come all those relieving moment gathered
all at once? I couldn’t thank and ask for more. It was an utterly amazing
month.
November: Break
My pace in this month was going slower. Took two-week break
from language class and decided to travel to Yogyakarta, the city of cultural
and heritage of Java. What an amazing destination! Even the tragic part was
more getting around the shopping center rather than visiting cultural site. My
companion and I walked to Alun-alun and Taman Sari, but we ended up in
Ambarukmo Plaza, Hartono Mall, Lippo, Filosofi Kopi, Tempo Gelato, you name it.
Anyways, I didn’t really enjoy November since gonorrhea
attacked my pinky and sensitive body. My mobility was absolutely distracted,
and even my parents also worried about my ailment which made me feel bitter. When
I got sick, I was always deeply helpless and the worst part, I was thousand
miles apart from home. Such a terrible pain. One full month was the time to
fully cure this, after short break, GP consultation, and self-conventional
treatment.
December: Combat
The last month was full of ending. The end of warm season,
class, and few friends meeting. Yet, another pleasure appear as I achieved my
reading challenge target, 35 over 35 and perhaps would be more till the end of
the year. It was a tricky way actually since I attempted to read five books in
a week which I felt so difficult in previous months. My desire to combat the
challenge which I failed last year is in maximum degree, so I put a lot of time
to finish my reading bucket list. Another lesson more, anything could come to
us when we really put our effort into it.
To sum up, I didn’t feel that this year is running so fast.
Everything was on their own constellation, normally. I reviewed what had been
happened, contemplated and reflected more. The rest of the year would be easy,
I wish. Next year would be more enticing to live within.
All those experiences this year had brought me to be more
mindful person. Yeah, I’m still on my way to learn how to be more selfless when
it comes to help people in need and I know it could take long life learning process.
We admit, people live on their own struggle every single day. This fact should
make us to be more concern, at least, to support our beloved families, friends, or
acquaintances. Bear in mind, please, to keep being by their side and make them
don’t feel alienated and lonely.
It’s truly, completely hard to live our perplexed life, it
would be harder when we don’t have people to get along with us. Hear passionately their story if they don't mind. Be more
compassionate, to our own self, to our surroundings!
